New Beginnings

Janine
Hello, and welcome to The West Meeting room. We are broadcasting on CiUT 89.5 FM at Hart House. My name is Janine. And for this week's episode, we'll be sharing a recording from our team at the West meeting room reflecting on the past year we've had together, from interviewing guests on campus, to developing our own original stories, to bonding as a team together and growing in the process. This recording gives you an insight into what it's like to be part of the wonderful family that is The West Meeting Room. I hope you enjoy this episode. And may you find the team that inspires you to do the work that is most authentic to you and silences that little voice of doubt in your mind. We hope you enjoy this week's episode of The West Meeting Room.

Braeden
Live in The West Meeting Room for one last time! With this cohort of producers! Wooo! [laughs]

Rebekah
I was gonna say it's kind of like surreal. I think things like it's been what eight months? Weird. Time is fake, time is not a real construct. Time keeps going whether we want it to or not again.

Braeden
I love that you said that. Because you said that in the - what was the interview from like, three four years ago?

Rebekah
Oh, really? 

Braeden
Yeah. Is that like, when you were in your first year? Yeah, I guess October of your first year where you had that first roundtable with John and Sabrina. And yeah, you were like, yeah, “time is fake”. Which is like a constant thread of like, yeah, that's been a truth that you keep returning to which, it definitely resonates.

Rebekah
It's kind of my motto that's, I just don't believe in time. So there's that.

Janine
Um, I'm just like, really happy, I learned so many technical skills in the past 8 months. Like other than, like, you know, like really exploring some things I care about, and learning about how to host and how to interview people. But just like learning more about like, the art of like mixing, editing, putting things together. Even like, when you edit other people's work, there is an art in that as well. And there's still so much for me to learn. And I'm really excited to learn more, but I'm just really happy that now I feel like -  like leaving or you know, finishing this work study, I'm like, I'm good to go, you know. Like, give me something, I want to project! I'll do it for you. You know, I want to do this project, Okay, let's do it! Like, there isn't that fear of like, oh I'm gonna postpone it, postpone it, postpone it. I want to do my own work. But then I didn't give myself the time to properly learn these skills before. So I'm really happy that now I feel like it's a mix of like confidence and also like, just enjoying the process of learning more about audio. And, yeah, that's where I am eight months later.

Sabrina
Yeah. It's so interesting hearing everyone talk about like, eight months later, or like, some time but with the disconnect in between. It's been a cool four years for me. It's been 48 months. And here we are. So Janine, and I love what you had to say. And you're better than me because the process that I went through over 48 months you condensed down into eight. Well, yeah, it's so interesting. I think for me kind of coming up on this end, because basically right ,for like the past literally handful of years, it's like every time a contract has come to an end I was always like, Okay, cool. I'm just gonna wait for someone to send me the next contract. Or like, I'm just gonna wait til the next work study period. And now there's no more. There's no more waiting. There's no more work study for me. And it's such a weird feeling. I was literally talking earlier about how I feel like that high school trope is a lie. And I feel like after I'm finished my last exam, like that's gonna be truly like the first day of the rest of my life. Like, you know, in high school movies, it's like that graduation’s like “today is the first day of the rest of your life.” It's like, no, for some of you maybe, but quite a few of you are going to go to post-secondary education and just have like the same kind of thing, but more self-regulated for a good couple of years. And because I don't plan on extending my studies, I feel like I'm truly coming up to the first day of the rest of my life, and I don't, I don't know what I'm gonna do. I don't know what I'm gonna do with it. So we'll see.

Braeden
Melissa, I'm curious to hear your perspective, because you sort of joined the team halfway through in like a graphics/social media capacity, and then we nudged you into becoming a producer. Having successfully launched recently, last year, your first podcast episode - Like Yeah, what has that I guess process been like for you?

Melissa

I think it's, I mean, overall, it's been a really rewarding process. But I think, I don't know, the way that I kind of describe it is surprising, in a sense, because I didn't really expect to get this experience. Like when I, you know, I was working with Day on get crafty. And then you know, she asked me to help out with this. And you're right, it started very much as like a just social media type thing and evolved quickly into some other stuff, too. So I think it was just a pleasant surprise that I had, that I, you know, have gotten to experience this. But when I started school, like at U of T I guess two years ago, which is weird to say, or even this year, for my second year, like audio, and podcasting was not really in like my line of vision. So I think it's been a nice surprise and a really great way to sort of, I don't know, fill out my resume, I guess, in ways that I wouldn't really have had the opportunity to because I don't know, that's just not really a part of what we do, like in museum studies. I mean, I'm sure you could do podcasts and things like that, but it's not typical. So yeah, it's been really great for me, and a nice surprise that I got to spend a couple months here. And what Sabrina actually just said, about starting the rest of your life hit real close to home, because this is it for me, too. So yeah, it's been kind of a nice way to round out the last year of school until I have a midlife crisis and inevitably go back to school. But yeah, it's been really great. And it's been fun more than anything I think. So that's nice, too.

Janine
I love that so much Melissa. And I just want to say that, I totally get that. For me, um, I don't know, it's interesting you guys say it's the first day of the rest of your life because for me, I just see it as like, I'm just so excited to be done writing papers for a long, long, long time. And I want to say - [dog barking in background] apologies, my dog is annoying. I just want to say that I wanted to work at Hart House, The West Meeting Room, at Hart House Stories way before I ever applied. And that was something I told Braeden. Like, it's something that my friends knew about, my family knew about, I was like, yeah, you know, like, I'm going to work there. I'm going to do my thing. I'm going to work on the podcast, like, I really want this. Because I knew someone who had done it last year. I spent all summer like, sounds so nerdy, but like manifesting it, being like, I’m gonna do this, I'm gonna, you know, learn. I want to be part of this team. Like I was so determined. Like seeing it on the other end, like actually having done it, is really cool. Because I think I even fangirl about it more now on the other side than I did before. And it was better than what I expected it to be because I just wanted creative space. That's, that's all I wanted, is like space to have my voice be loud and clear. Because I felt like when I was doing a lot of writing on campus, it would be overly edited and things, and I didn't feel like my voice was coming across. And I think it's like, symbolic, but also like literal, like your voice coming across in our little like, slot in the morning like that, to me is it just feels like, you know, we're leaving a mark, or at least like, some of our episodes have reached people that I never even, I've never met on campus. And it's interesting how so many people, you know, have had similar experiences, understand your perspectives, how many people get excited about certain things that you get excited about. I don't know. It's just, I just think that it's unique from other spaces on campus because it's a lot more, I don't know, dynamic. Maybe that's the word I would use. I felt like it's, especially the episode I did about shame was something that really meant a lot to me because I was able to, it was really cathartic to be able to talk about something that's has been controlling you for your whole life and be able to like, make it funny and make it light and make it interesting with other people. 

Braeden
So I'm curious - so just going off of the first day of the rest of your life, what does that day look like for all of you? So you hand in that last paper, you do that last exam, it's the day after - What do you, what are you doing? What are you planning?

Sabrina
I'm going to work. It's a Saturday, I have a shift. I’m working seven hours, which I don't know might be like a really dreary, poetic progression. [laughs] But we'll see what am I doing. The Sunday after I'm also going to work. So what am I doing on the Monday? That remains to be seen. Hopefully taken a nap.

Rebekah
I mean, I love it. For me, I have like a little bit of a getaway planned at the end of like classes just to get out of the city because I don't get to leave at all, and this during the year. So just trying to spend some time in nature and just spend some time outside and spend some time with like people who are close to me, because I just don't get to do that enough. I spent a lot of time this year by myself, especially living by myself. So I just want to spend a little bit more time like, with restrictions permitting to like be in the company of other people. I technically don't finish my last exam until the 19th. But I have a little bit of time between now and then to just, to kind of do whatever. So I just realized I'm going to finish my undergrad on like a random Thursday. And I like can't do anything to really like celebrate that. But for, I mean, unlike other folks, like I'm actually considering going to like continuing education. So I'm not quite yet there at that point where I'm like, Alright, first day of the rest of my life. Like, I know, I'm getting there. And I'm literally moving to a new city. So that's like another journey in itself. And that's exciting and terrifying. Yeah, I'm just ready to be in Toronto in the summer for a little bit longer. Because I just think the city has a different energy during the summer. And I want to experience that one last time before I go.

Melissa
I think I also finish on a random Thursday, Rebekah, so I feel that. Um, and yeah, I don't think I'm doing anything special other than maybe just like taking a break. Like I even, I've been in school for far too many consecutive years. So I think yeah, just taking some time. Echoing what Sabrina said, taking a nap like sounds great. Spending some time in nature. And I think just taking like a hiatus from job applications and doing all that stuff, like not for a long time. But even just for like to have a week off to do whatever I want. With no restrictions. I have like some part time work, but nothing that's too crazy. So yeah, I think just letting myself enjoy having no responsibilities for like five seconds before it starts back up again. But yeah, it's also on a Thursday. My partner's working all day. It's a pandemic. So maybe we'll order pizza or something exciting. But yeah, that's, that's kind of the extent of celebration. 

Maybe I can get my partner to take me out for ice cream. We'll see about that. That would be ideal for me. The ideal celebration involves ice cream.

Janine
I was gonna say that for us, because we fast like during Ramadan and Ramadan’s gonna start on the 13th of April I think. So yeah, I'm just gonna eat with my family when we break her fast, which is gonna be just like any other day. Like, my mom is more excited about it than I am. I'm just kind of like, kind of over it. I don't really want to do anything, but my mom's like, No, we have to like, you know, we'll get cake, we'll get something. I was like, I just really don’t. Because for me, it doesn't feel like proper closure. Like you guys said, it's a random day. And I'm also like, trying to think beyond this year. It's like Oh, you're actually finishing like four years of education. To me, I'm just like, yeah, I'm just finishing the semester. Like I don't, I don't think it's gonna hit me until I start a full time or part time job like in September or something I don't know. Like, I just can't imagine myself not being a student. I can't imagine the day that I'm like “Hi I'm a fresh graduate. I'm not a student.” Like you know? Cuz I used to always be like “yeah, I’m a student” whatever. Like that's just been part of my thing for so long. Maybe Melissa, like you definitely, I'm sure you feel this a lot because like, you're finishing your Masters. And so I'm like, it's gonna be odd.

Melissa
I was just gonna say that I feel that 100%. I've been, like I went from high school to undergrad to Masters. So I, my introduction and identity has entirely been “Hi, I'm in x year of this degree for like six years”. And it's going to be weird to like at some point introduce myself as “Hi, I'm Melissa. I'm [insert career here]. So I definitely feel that. That's very nerve wracking. And yeah, it'll be definitely an adjustment.

Sabrina
I did want to say in all seriousness, because I feel like my answer was a half answer. This isn't like directly after, we'll see. But I definitely like, I maintain that this entire degree has been a trauma for me.  

It’s - there’s been good parts, but there's been parts where it's been like a truly terrible experience. And I am fully planning on a couple of things which are like personal to me. So I'm not gonna go into it. But basically just, I'm planning on doing a whole like self commitment ceremony and ritual sometime either in April or May. Because part of this being a trauma was like truly disrespecting myself and like putting my needs, my like mental health and my physical health, my spiritual needs like second to handing stuff in and like doing tasks and doing exams. So that's fully like something that I plan to do is to like, re-self commit, and like promise to myself that like, I'm not going to end up or put myself in more situations where I need to disrespect myself in virtue of like achieving a goal.

Braeden
So then zooming out a bit, and maybe looking a bit further beyond the immediate end of your studies. It's five years from now, and you're working on your dream project. You know, what does that look like? And, you know, maybe that's hard to think of specifics, but sort of like, what elements of like your values or your work do you hope is like cast into the future five years from now? And like, what are you 

focusing your time, energy, attention on. Like yeah, what's like, I don't know, almost like casting a spell towards that, what does that look like?

Rebekah
That's such a hard question. Because I think I've like done different iterations of this for different applications that I've written. But whether or not I truly believe all of those things, that’s another point. I think for me, it would, I want to be closer to my family, I feel like having been four years away from my family, I didn't realize how much that would impact me. So I'm hoping to reconnect and rebuild those kinds of relationships. I really am interested in my family history. So I'm hoping I can use some of these skills and just like techniques with like storytelling to really get in and like tell my family's history in an interesting way. I mean, not to say that my family history is at all important to anyone else besides me. But like, I just think it would be cool to really document that kind of stuff. And I'm also just interested in like continuing to be in community and like speaking with folks and learning about their experiences, and working with kids. I really love working with kids. So if I could find a way to like do all of those things in five years, or like have that in a project. I don't want to say, I don't want to put out to the universe what I think that project should be because I don't know. But just finding a way to like involve all of those things into whatever work I'm doing.

Janine
For me, in 5, it's so weird to think 5 years, I can't even imagine it. But in five years if - I like that we're recording this because I can actually listen to it in five years and see if it happened. But I want to travel. And I, every single frustration I've had about how conflict has been broadcasted on Western media, I, I've just kind of stored inside of me and I've like internalized it, written it down. And I really want to be able to, you know, be a foreign correspondent. To be able to like travel to different places in the Middle East, to speak in my language and be able to actually, you know, capture stories about real people living in conflict or living in, you know, heartbreaking situations and be able to convey that to the rest of the world. Like that's something I deeply care about because I think in the past few years, it's been really hard seeing everything go down in like the region I'm from, where my family's from. And to be able to have seen it through, you know, a Canadian lens or an American lens has been frustrating. Not all the time, of course. But there are certain things that have really made me passionate about, you know, this isn’t an accurate This isn’t right. This doesn't reflect the people's day to day struggles, this doesn't reflect the loss that we've endured over the years. So my thing is, I just want to go talk to people, be able to record these stories, be able to broadcast these stories, because I think that I'm just so sick and tired of like just stats every time something happens. And like, this has happened, this many people have died, this - and it's part of news, but it's just like, I feel like I hope to humanize part of that news. And I think that's what I want to do wherever I am. I just want to be able to talk to people, and be able to convey a perspective and to be honest, like, fight for some people that are marginalized in different areas and be able to use my privilege to just like start a conversation about things. Part of that includes ethnic minorities, some of these different communities. So I'm excited, I'm excited to, you know, really learn the skills in different positions, different life experiences. But I just hope one day that I’ll be able to travel back home and tell stories of people, to just ask questions and stuff like that. So one day..

Sabrina
Yeah, I don’t know. I feel similarly to Rebekah. Both that I've had to think about these things for various applications. And then also that, I don't know if I want to say anything specific. You said five years, and I was like, wow, I'll be 27, which is like interesting. Because like, I turn 22 in June, and I feel like, particularly growing up, sometimes I feel like in my mind, I'm still like mentally, like 17. Like, my context is still in like the 12^th grade. Like, I'll go to the LCBO and they'll be like, how old are you? And I’ll be like 

I'm 16. And I'm like, actually, No. I'm 22. Please, please don't call the police. I feel like I was like rooted in my high school graduation, and the last four years has been like a fever dream. So from that version of myself, I really couldn't conceptualize like living life past 21. And that's just because like, it seems like every single year up to 21 is important for various reasons. And then 21 is like when you can drink in the States, and like, everyone knows about that. And then next thing you know, you're like 30. Like, you wake up and you're like 30. And like, that's also like that is based on the media. That's how like your life is portrayed. So I feel like I'm just gonna like go to sleep on my 22nd birthday and then I'm gonna wake up and I'm like 31. So I don't know, I don't know what 27 is going to be. I've never really thought of that. That is a year, I think it's your Saturn return. I think it's like a terrible time in your life astrologically like everything shifts. 

But, um, so anyway, yeah. I don’t know if I want to commit to anything because it sounds like there’s a 

lot of change, but then also a lot of ambiguity. And I don't know how to really conceptualize or visualize what 27 is going to be like, but I do hope I can - I was talking about like how this degree is a trauma, and I've spent most of it just disrespecting my immediate needs. I hope that in five years I can look at kind of like what I've built for myself and see that I've created a life way or a narrative surrounding my life that's rooted in respect for myself and respect for like, the humanity that exists with that, or around me, instead of respect for like capital "R” respect for buildings, respect for objects and things like capital. Respect for humanity and like living beings, and that includes non-human living beings. I also think I've talked to Braeden about this quite a bit, but I also think our society is rid of all those messages about like suffering through a certain period for like some like untenable reward that's going to come eventually after, you know, it's like you spend your entire first 65 years of your life just suffering so that you can like retire. You know, like you suffer through a degree so you can get a job, but then you suffer the job so you can pay off your bills. And you suffer through the job so you can like help your kids go and get into degrees so they can pay off their bills. And then you turn 65 and then you can retire. And I'm trying to divest from that narrative and allow myself to experience joy and reward in this moment, instead of just keep telling myself that it's like slog through this and then you'll experience joy. I just want to experience joy. I am here, like I feel like you know, people are like “what are you excited for?” And like, yeah, there are certain things that I'm excited for in terms of career, but I'm honestly excited to retire. But not in the idea that I'm excited to retire at 65. It's like, I'm excited to create the life that it's like, you know, people are like “oh, I wish I can retire. I'm so excited to retire and like do all this stuff.” Like I'm excited to just like create a life where I can do those things now. I was not made to labor under this capitalistic system. So I'm excited to just like relax. This brings me back to the nap that I mentioned in the first place. So yeah.

Melissa
Um, everybody's already set a lot of really great stuff. But without getting too like mushy. I think it’s similar to what Sabrina was just saying, like, I'd mostly just like to be happy. I mean, obviously, I guess I have other goals, such as like working in a museum and more like surface level things like that. But I don't know, I always say that like, I don't really care what I end up doing as long as I like it. So if like, like Rebekah, I also really like working with kids and teaching kids. And if that's in a museum, then that's great. And if it's not in a museum, then that's also great. So I don't know, I think my goal, like my very surface level goal is just to like enjoy what I do. But yeah, I guess other things. This seems like such a random thing, but I just really want a dog. I feel like that's another goal for five years. Like I, they're just things that I like, I'd like to you know, continue adventuring, and going camping with my partner. And I don't know, just like expanding my family. Not necessarily like children wise, but like, dogs wise and experience wise. And like having new experiences like outside of school. Because I feel like everything that I've had has always been really centered around school. Like, sure we can go on this adventure, but it has to be around this date and that date, and like always really tied to academic deadlines. And I don't know. I guess even things that we do like going camping, when there’s school, I'm like, you're still thinking about school. So I feel like just having the opportunity to even, like Janine said, to travel without having to constantly think about school. That just will be really nice. So yeah, whatever that looks like, as long as I'm happy. I think that is that is the goal. But yeah, definitely dogs and definitely working in a museum at some point would be ideal.

Braeden
One of the things I remember when I graduated was just being like, all of a sudden opening up to the possibility of just like a reading for fun. Like, Oh my god, I could like read a graphic novel that my friend told me about. I could start reading a book and then just like put it down if I didn't like it, or just like throw it away. Are there things that like, I don't know, are there like fun things that all of you would want to learn like, you know, outside of this like academic life?

Rebekah
100%. I was just telling my friend the other day, like I'm so excited to do some summer reads. My good reads list has over 157 books that I actually like want to read. So there's a lot of material there. Whether or not I'm not going to get through all 157 this summer - I read like maybe a book every six months so if I can get through two I'll be happy. But other projects that I really want to like get involved with, I'm actually really interested in pole-dancing. So, and I've been wanting to take some classes. I'm really sad that Ontario has been in lockdown because my goal by the end of this year was to have taken a pole dancing class. And I couldn't do it because all the studios have been closed for literally months. But yeah, I'm excited to hopefully try that out in a future time period. Just to like be more active with my body. This year in particular, it's been really hard to like stay motivated, to like be active and just moving around because I spend so much time at my computer. But I'm just hoping to like do more projects, like maybe take a kickboxing class. I don't know just do fun things like that just to really switch things up. 

Sabrina
Yeah pole dancing is so much fun Rebekah. I’ve been resolutioning to get back into it. But then other sports have always taken precedent. But I support that for you. I feel like you'd love it. Um similar to Braeden, I'm like excited to read for fun. I tried to invest in reading, like I got a reader that is waterproof so I can like read in the bathtub over the Christmas break. It was nice. And I read two books like I did, they were The Handmaid's Tale and The Testament. So then I had like, and then I started watching the series, but then I had an existential crisis. I had such a crisis I was like talking to my therapist about it I was like “No! and then they're gonna take me!” And she was like it's not real. I'm like stressed so I think that was a bad idea as reading material.

And then the semester started and then I just fell off reading entirely so I'm very excited to start reading again and not have to put it down because like school starts up. I had this like false narrative in my head that I could like keep reading for fun and like do my degree and that's a lie. I said that I'm like ending my education, but that's like also a lie. I think I'm just looking for learning in different environments that isn't like institutions. Or it's like institutions that are like venerated by our pervasive system. So I applied for an herbalism course, it's like an eight month thing. I find out if I get it in a couple of weeks, but hopefully I get in. And then I'm excited to do that and continue my studies even if I don't get in. 

And then similar to Rebekah, I also, I want to move my body in interesting ways. I want to get back into tumbling class. I've been trying to get like a standing talk on my own for like literally six years. I had it in like the sixth grade and it left me. So I'm excited to do that. I want to start roller skating, hop on that trend. I want to get back into pole. I also do like, I want to start like getting more into like, literally wilderness stuff. So Melissa, if you want to have like camping friends, me and my partner come down with you and your partner and like rent a van or something and like drive across Canada. I do want to travel a bit, but I kind of want to see what Canada has to offer as like a, like land wise. So wild that it's like less expensive in some cases to like fly to Europe than it is to like go to some other province. 

So yeah, I just, there's so many things that I want to do. And a lot of it is, like it just revolves around me. Like, literally, there's, I've had conversations with people about like how I may or may not have ADHD, which is like a whole different thing. But the thing is, because my brain is one of those brains where it's like, it just latches on to ideas and then it's like obsessed with that for like three weeks. And we just like, my brain’s like let's learn about this! No, let's learn about this! Let's do this! So for me, I think I'm gonna take some time after this degree because I feel like part of this, like this degree’s a trauma kind of thing, it has been like me having to force myself to stay interested in something for like a sustained period of like literally almost half a decade in these like different degree areas that like, I'm completely checked out at this point. Like, I want to learn about herbs, and I'll learn about like moving my body in different ways. And like that's - I've learned some stuff, like I can do it. I know, I can do it now. But for me, yoy is now going in the complete opposite direction and just like following my impulses. You know, and learning about working on a farm and then not doing that, and like learning about working on cars. So I just want to do a bunch of stuff.

Janine
I was gonna, I was gonna say skating as well. But I wasn't gonna say rollerblading. Like I meant skating like ice skating. Because I feel really embarrassed because like, we've been here for four years and don't know how to skate and I can't like do it by myself, I still use the baby penguin things. I want to learn. I want to learn how to use Final Cut Pro and I want to, you know, work on a movie. Eventually. I want to continue ballet, because I grew up in ballet for like 14 years. And so I would like to go back to it more confidently, divorced from whatever weight I'm in. I want it to be like a positive healthy experience for myself. That's like a big goal for me. And reading. Yeah, absolutely. Like I would love to read. I want to read a book in French and understand that. That's my goal, is I'm looking at a few books and I haven't read in so long. And I feel like a lot of books I choose are kind of heavy. But I recently read Roxane Gay's book Hunger and that’s, and it's one of like, it's quickly become one of my favorite books, because there's just something about that book that really resonated with me. And I highly recommend it to anyone interested in like reading about her story about body image in general. So yeah.

Melissa
I think a lot of my hopes are the same as what has been said already. I haven't read a book that's not like, I read a lot of like self-help and mental health books, which is like easy for me to read because I guess like mental health is like my jam. But other than that, I haven't been able to find a book that I actually was able to continue reading for more than like 10 pages. So I think that is something that I'd like to do is to just find a book or a series or an author that I really like, even if it's just one and actually have a good time reading a book because school is like, yeah. It drains all of the fun out of reading. And another like really specific goal I have is to finish knitting a cardigan. I started it over Christmas, in the break, when I had a bunch of free time. But basically since January started, I haven't been able to continue working on it because I can't justify spending like three hours not doing schoolwork. So it's been like 75% finished just sitting in a drawer and it's gonna be too warm to wear it. But I'd still like to finish it. So that is another goal of mine. And yeah, I think going camping more often. I mean, I know that's definitely dependent on like finances and work and whatever. But my partner and I really are into like back country camping. So we just, we got a canoe last summer and a bunch of that stuff. So I think really challenging ourselves that way. And exploring more places together would be really fun. But yeah, definitely knitting for sure, getting back into that, because that's also a really important self care thing for me. I find that like knitting, because you're focusing so hard on like accomplishing our thing, I feel like it really like quiets my anxiety. Which, I mean, it also stresses me out, because sometimes it's hard. But I feel like the general day to day like racing thoughts are really quieted through knitting. So I feel like practicing that kind of self care is going to be important when I have more time. Which is terrible to say that you don't have time for self care. But I mean, it unfortunately is true, especially at the end of the school year. So yeah, just paying more attention to myself, reading more for fun, and also about mental health to learn more about like myself and what other people are going through and spending time outside would be ideal. I mean, obviously safely, but outside for sure.

Sabrina
I also wanted to jump back in and say something to you that I found is like a weird feeling. But I definitely want to revisit me talking about meeting being divested from my degree. But also I want to revisit concepts of my like, from my degree. I'm studying important stuff, I'm studying interesting things. I just feel like the way that the institution is set up to like test you and like the way it's all integrated is so stressful that like - I know so many people who like don't, can't do half the readings, right? Because like, there's just so many demands when we have to like work a bunch of jobs and like all this stuff. And I just feel like too, this like, I'm feel like I'm gonna have this sense of relief where I can like follow topics that we maybe just touched on one week in class, but like really deep dive instead of having to like move on to the next author just because of the syllabus and not read something because I have to for like a reflection. But like really sit down and like digest it over like a good period of time. If it's like dense work, like sometimes we read such, like 50 pages of like, dense convoluted work. And then they're like, hey, do it by Thursday and then write like a five page essay. And I'm like, this is too much. So I'm like also excited to like go back and look at these things for my degree, but like not have that pressure.

Rebekah
Honestly, like big retweet. To me, I’ve like read, like we've had so many amazing things on my syllabus this year, like my Black Canadian History course. And so, and I've had to like skim a lot of readings, like you mentioned, just for like the sake of time, because you get a week. And I'm not a fast reader by any means, especially when I'm like really trying to digest things. And I find that often I'm just like skimming for details and not really like getting at the meat of what's happening. So um yeah, there's several courses, like really interesting history courses that I've taken over the last couple of years. And I'm like, wow, if I actually had time to sit with this and ponder how this like impacts me, that would be great. But there was no time for that in this degree. So the semester is 13 weeks. Also, yes to all of the skates. I'm going to show you guys my skates real quick. [Rebekah goes to get her beautiful new pair of roller skates to show everyone]

Sabrina
Oh my gosh, I’m, also I don't know if you can hear me because you're walking away from your computer...

[Everyone exclaims how beautiful they are!]

Rebekah
They’re bright yellow. Thank you! Yellow is my second favorite color. So, yeah.

Braeden
Um, the only other question I had for the room was, and just thinking about how, you know, a lot of you were saying it's kind of going to be like a shift in identity to not be a student anymore. And it's just got me thinking about sort of challenging the way that we introduce ourselves. Like, it's interesting that the way we introduce ourselves is tied to work or like a career or being a student. And so maybe just to like switch that up a bit. Like, what would be, maybe we could just do a go around of like, let's introduce ourselves in a way that's not tied to a job or school. I don't know. I'll start off as an example. Like, my name is Braeden, and I'm really bad at skateboarding, but I love it. And I'm learning how to quilt.

Rebekah
Whoa, this is so hard. Um I think - Hi everyone. I'm Rebekah. I love languages. I'm super accident prone. Um, and yeah, I don't know. And I'm a person who loves the color purple. That's me.

Sabrina
Yeah. Hi. My name is Sabrina. And I like to move my body in interesting ways and connect with my physical form. And I'm always flirting with the idea, although I love living in the city, of like disappearing into the wilderness, and living off the land and like never coming back. And I don't really know how I'm gonna marry those two things. I feel like that's gonna be my overarching life. Cool. Yeah.

Melissa
Let's see. Um, my name is Melissa. I am passionate about mental health advocacy. I love the color yellow, and anything that looks like a grandma couch print. And I love to bake. Although I don't like eating all of the baking that I have because I'm only one person. I do enjoy to make things to share with people.

Janine
Hi, my name is Janine. And I would define myself as someone that is obsessed with talking, especially talking on the phone. I love meeting people for the first time and I don't shut up. By that, I mean, I may ask questions that seem really random to people. But I really love getting to know people and talking to friends and family. And another thing that you might not know about me is I'm obsessed with this movie 10 Things I Hate About You. I've seen it 75 times, can write the script for you. And I love the smell of newspapers and I love reading hard copies of newspaper. That's it.

Rebekah
Wow, look at us people who have interest in lives outside of being students! Who would have thought.

Janine
Out of curiosity, has anyone else watched 10 things I Hate About You? And do you hate it or like it because I feel like people either despise it, or they really like it. I just really love Heath Ledger. It's a good movie.

Sabrina
It’s a good movie. I mean it’s like, it's not in like Bring It On level Hall of Fame for me. Like it's, like if you want to talk about good movies we can talk about Bring It On. But like, yeah, it's a good movie. I don't hate it. But yeah, I mean, I don't love it, but it's okay.

Rebekah
I don't think I've seen it. But I definitely have not seen it 75 times so I kind of get them confused with a lot of other movies of that similar era/genre, so I might be - is that a movie with Amanda Bynes?

Janine
No. You're thinking of She’s The Man, probably.

Rebekah
Ok, then. Yeah. I see.

Janine
Julia – I forget her last name. But she was just like - it's supposed to be based on Taming of the Shrew. And so yeah, like, she's just like a feminist and like a she talks about all these books that she reads and like, I just love her attitude.  I idolized her as a child. And I also love Amanda Bynes. I love her movies too. 

Braeden
Um, that's all I got. Anyone - well, Janine, since you like to ask weird questions, you want to have the last word and ask a weird question for the room to close it out?

Janine
[laughs] Now? Okay, let me think. Um, should we go generic? Or should we go like, actually, like, properly bizarre.

Braeden
Let's get weird!

Rebekah
Go all the way.

Janine
What is one thing about you that you think most people don't know. That is something that you, like something that you do that most people don't know about, but you think is really cool. So like a nerdy fact about yourself. 

Rebekah
I really love painting cards for people. So hand painted cards, but I think that's something that people know about me. But yeah, I've been in the business for myself painting cards for folks and trying to make each one different than the last.

Braeden
Like one of my like, lifetime dreams is to compete in a tractor pull one day, on like a tractor that I restored. Like, I like fantasize about like 1950s like Ford tractors and showing up to the county fair and like dragging some heavy ass logs and like winning the tractor pull contest. Like I feel like that's just like, that's the one thing I yeah - it's just like a daydream that's always there. And like, if I, even just to compete, I would be like I have arrived. I can die happy now.

Melissa
I'm trying to think of one. I mean, you guys might already know about this, because I mentioned it earlier, but I think I've mentioned it before. But like my partner and I restored a canoe last summer, which I think is like, sort of a thing that not a lot of people have done, I guess. So yeah, I guess I know my way around resin and fiberglass, which is like kind of a weird skill to have. And I don't know when I'll ever use that again. But yeah, so I kind of, I know how to do that. So if you ever need a canoe repaired, I mean, probably go to somebody more qualified, but I could probably do an okay, job.

Sabrina
In that same grain, I mean, this is definitely something that some people know. But, um, like we started home brewing alcohol. So we homebrew mead. And in general, like, I guess an interest or something that I do is like trying to like condense the things that we need for sustenance. Like, I'm not trying to like build a PlayStation 5, because that's like a whole different thing. But when it comes to like things that you can gather from nature, so like drinks and food and like soap and stuff like that, like an interest that I have is like making it myself. So it's very much like,  why would I go to the LCBO when I can just like brew my own beer? Which is actually like very dangerous. And I'm finding as I like learn about these things like, making soap for example, like lye can blind you and stuff. Like a lot of these things that seem very simple are actually quite dangerous. That’s my thing.

Janine
I love all these answers. I know you all a bit more now. I can't really think of one thing. I think that, um, I have this thing, which I think everyone's like, Yeah, I do this too. But like, I think I do in excess, which is, I talk to myself a lot. Like I say things out loud. But sometimes, if someone were to listen, they would find it a bit bizarre, because I’m like having arguments with myself. Like while thinking about something like “No, like, Why the hell would you say that? Why?” Like almost like verbalizing self criticism, like having a conversation. And I do this with my dog. And I know a lot of people do this. But like, I really, I don't know what it is. I just, I just think she gets me. Like I just, I don't know, we fight. I honestly think her and I have fights. And like we understand. It's so odd. I don't know how to explain it to anyone else who doesn’t have a dog. But it's just like, I don't know, I say things out loud. And lately, I haven't even been journaling. I've just been talking about things and it helps me understand what I'm thinking more. But sometimes it can get very dramatic and weird. But yeah, that's something about myself, is like for me to understand myself. I literally, I don't know how to do it unless I verbalize it. I don't know what I'm thinking like, I can't identify thought until I just say it out loud. But yeah, I don't have any cool like things about myself. When I was young I was big on collecting J14. I had J14 magazine, Teen Vogue, was on top of it. I had all the posters. That's like when the cool period of my life ended and now I’m kind of boring. 

Braeden
Well, I don't think being boring is anything that anyone in this group can claim. So I guess with that, that's a wrap!

[Everyone cheers]

Rebekah
I'm like a little click, I don't have a clicker thing. But yeah. Applause! Wow!

Braeden
A year of virtual studio life. 

Rebekah
Wild.

Janine
Yeah, I'm just, I'm so weirded out that I have all these friends from this year that I've never met. Like, I wish I could be like, Oh, it's so funny. But it's odd. Like I have really close friends in the past year that I've met online or through classes that I've never met in person. Like I have a relationship with them and like I know their parents, and I'm like friends with them. They live in like Scarborough. It's not like they're far away. Scarborough downtown. But yeah I’m just so excited for the day that I actually meet my pandemic friends. 

Rebekah
We live in a simulation, and I stand by that. So I will say that every chance that I get. But I'm gonna pop off to take this quiz. 

[Everyone says Good luck!]

Braeden
Thanks so much everyone!

[Everyone says their goodbyes. Outro music plays.]

Janine
Thank you to The West Meeting Room Production team for sharing your stories with all of us today. This year has been crazy to say the least, during the pandemic, but it's definitely been so much richer working with all of you at Hart House Stories. You are listening to The West Meeting Room on CiUT 89.5 FM. We're here every Saturday at 7am. And you can find all of our episodes on our Hart House Stories page on SoundCloud. We'd love to hear from you. We're on Instagram at Hart House Stories and Twitter at @HHpodcasting. Thank you so much to all of you for listening. Take good care of yourselves and of each other and we'll be back with you soon.